8January1996

My dear folks,

Thank you Cathy for your fax - & congratulations, Conal, on passing your Matric exams. That’s exactly the kind of news one needs at the end of a holiday & we rejoice with you. I appreciate that you will be getting down to work & that will not be finding it easy after the vacation. I confess I have not found it easy either. I battled to fall asleep last night & I battled again to rise at 05:30 this morning for the first of five days on the lunchtime current affairs programme. The alarm clock pleased only Mavis who took it as a signal to trot upstairs & deposit his bulk upon Jones with a throaty purr. She had the last laugh - when he climbed into his box under the sunlamp this evening & made a careless turn. It somersaulted down on to the couch, she tells me, landing on top of him. He emerged with a careless lick while Jones hooted. The problem arises when we forget to shore up a corner of the box with the aluminium ladder. It’s almost worth doing it again for the sheer amusement. But that would be unfair.

RIP Francois Mitterrand. News of his death broke at 3 minutes to 10:00. Our programme went on air at 10:00. We bust a gut! We had the headlines rewritten by the start of the transmission & his obituary running 2 minutes later, with phonos & interviews to follow. But it took minutes off our lives. What panic stations. I can hardly describe it. Must be like taking a torpedo amidships. Anyhow, the brass was very pleased.
Apparently we beat CNN, the big opposition, to the draw by 4 minutes & it looked very good. One boss complained that it looked too good, as if we’d had an hour to put it together instead of a couple of minutes. It’s the analogy of the duck, all serenity above & frantic paddling down below. Better that way than the reverse.

I gather that there were 3 winners of the big lottery prize, two of whom have declared themselves to the organisers but chosen - sensibly - to remain anonymous. If I had to decide on how to spend £13 million, I should also keep mum. Thank you Cathy for the latest & welcome details of my German affairs. And Conal watch out for my computer suggestions at the bottom of the letter as I shall spare the rest of the family. The other big story of the day was the dump of snow over the East coast of America.
I confess I slightly envied those souls who had stocked up & were preparing to sit the blizzard out. Such a fate would have suited me well in Germany. You can tell your daughters Cathy that I got a zero in a game of computer golf this evening. Next time, if it please you, I shall bring the games disk & install it on your computer - only if it please you.

Right, Calgary Bensons, this part of the letter is directed towards you. Conal please note that I owe your father the rand equivalent of 1,200 Deutschemarks. Will you please see that this debt is honoured & that the sum is put towards a deposit on your computer. You need a MULTIMEDIA personal computer (or PC), i.e. one that is one that is capable of playing CD ROMS (ie computer CDs) and AUDIO CDs. It must have at least 8 megabytes of RAM (RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY, the computer’s muscles) and 500 megabytes of ROM (READ ONLY MEMORY, the computer’s storage memory space). It should come with at least a QUADSPEED CD. It should come with a Pentium CHIP & operate at not less than 60 megaherz, ideally 75 or more. Many different manufacturers make models that fit this specification.

Most important, it must come with at least a year’s guarantee of repair, preferably at your home (ON SITE) & a TELEPHONE HELPLINE. Start making your enquiries & let me know what you find.
Much love for now.
T